Tuesday 23 November 2010

When the Sanguine Smell FOUL

...I will be there to catch you as you fall
With a brilliant smile on my face
I will say, "I'll miss you darling"
With no pain in my eyes

When the sanguine feel foul
I will forget you I promise
With the rising of tomorrow's sun
I will lick the filth off your face
With the tongue you loved to restrain

When the sanguine is foul
I will walk toward the horizon
With barely contained shivers
I will laugh at your wide open eyes
With no remorse that I stole your life

When the sanguine coat my body
I will abandon humanity

With death drenching my soul
I will walk this road alone
With bodies littering the trail

-------------------------------

Oh gosh, that sounded really morbid...ah well. I just thought the title looked like a really nice starting line for a poem so I wrote a continuation in the post. It somehow expanded to include 4 verses...

I have nothing much to write/type about, but maybe I should share with you guys my incredible success with my new tablet? Okay, so I'm ego-ing a bit, but hey, how many people can say they learnt how to paint digitally in...around a month? I'm not saying my painting is WONDERFUL, full of sunshine and rainbows, but I am good for an amateur. Okay, tooting my own horn...

Let me just share with you some of the things I have done with my tablet. They're not the best digital works there are around, but they're precious to me, because I painted them while I was learning (still am, though) the ropes of digital painting. Goodness, the tablet was so difficult to use when I first tried it...

These are in chornological order, but I skipped some pieces cuz' they weren't particularly beautiful (or were simply sketches). All of them are linked back to the original page on deviantART which hosts them (click on the images, not the titles). If you'd like to find me on deviantART I'm here: Ferrero13

Elements: Keryiall (an additional character from my element story)
Elements: Keryiall
Er...she is not a confirmed character in the element story, but she might be included.

Hetalia: Independence (a Hetalia fan art, obviously)
Independence
This is not shounen-ai (boy love). These are my 2 favourite characters from Hetalia, and they share a rather complex relationship, and I think the monochrome suits this depressing piece just fine.

Cake (er, the name's kinda complex, so I'll just leave it at this)
Cake
This is part of a birthday commission for Zann, but well, you can see it's kinda late for a birthday present...

Apple (Part 1 of the Fruit Faes series)
Apple
Part 2 is already complete. It's somewhere down, just scroll, but I don't think you'll get a very good look at it cuz' it's pretty...small? This image is good as a wallpaper.

Mango (Part 2 of the Fruit Faes series)
Mango
Yeah, the image proportions are a little extreme, but they work for the concept I had in mind for Mango.

Elements: Snowy Sentiment (Boron from the element story)
Elements: Snowy Sentiment
Unlike Keryiall, he IS a confirmed character. I mean, of course he is! He has an element name. This is my most recent piece, and the one I'm most proud of. Fur coat!

I'm working on another piece, which I expect won't be too nice. For one, this next one has line art, and the lines are a little too thick to be considered nice. Ugh, should have gone with a one pixel line or something like that. But the background should be rather interesting, though, because for the first time in digital painting history, I'm going to paint a proper background, not a haphazard abstract one. This next one is going to be a sky, although I'm not expecting much out of it since it is my first time painting proper backgrounds after all.

I think it'd be rather interesting to note that in the next piece I will most probably be including a poem...in CHINESE. Oh, the world is going to end. Gosh, my Chinese is so bad I had to check up almost every word of the poem, which, by the way, I should have known since...dunno, 2 or 3 years back or more. I seem to be forgetting how to write a lot of those characters...

There isn't much I'd like to contemplate about. My days at home during the school holidays mostly consist of reading manga online, downloading manga, playing some facebook games (I'm only playing 1 this holiday though, since playing more would be an epic waste of time), updating my element story, cementing characters from the element story, randomly browsing the internet, drawing, and now I'm adding digital painting to the list.

I want to paint something for my parents for Christmas since well, I wouldn't be painting anything digitally if not for them, but I can't find a suitable image to paint! I can't paint real people without references (not that I've ever tried painting them before), so yeah.

Hm, I'm not very talkative in this post...mostly, probably, because I don't have anything in mind to talk about. I just thought, if I don't update it sometime soon people are going to think I got killed or something. It's not too farfetched of an idea since I'm pretty sure my annoying personality and sour (not to mention scary!) face makes many people hate me easily.

Ugh. I really need to learn how to socialise, especially with the people whose personalities I find the most annoying...although, truly, I am infinitely, indefinitely, impossibly irritated by superficial people whose mouth spout one thing while their hearts give off a feeling of rot...or maybe my senses are off and they're actually giving off some flowery fragrance...

Meh, I'm not here to discuss about people I dislike, which most people may find it easy to relate to. Perhaps I should start a post listing the kind of people that make me want to smash their faces into walls. Well, let us begin, shall we?

1) Those who act like they're sexy/beautiful/pretty when in fact they aren't
2) Those who smile like an idiot but at the same time give off an incredibly nefarious and uneasy feeling
3) Those who take things without asking for permission (or indeed, just take without restraint
4) Those who ask questions when the answer was just stated ONE SECOND AGO (gosh, you have a brain, use it!)
5) Those who think that just because they are are sexy/beautiful/pretty they deserve ultimate respect in all areas such as academics, which has nothing to do with beauty pagents
6) Those who take others' things and expect others not to even touch theirs, in short, hypocrites
7) Those who spout vulgarities as if they are talking about the weather
8) Those who demand for unreasonable things continuously even after being denied
9) Those who can't tell when their logic has been proven false and persist in their stand
10) Those who are inconsiderate pests who do not spare even a gram of their brain to think about others, in other words, those who are selfish

These are the top ten kinds of people I find most annoying. Feel free to make up your own list.

Now I do not mean to say I don't commit any of these things which I really detest, because I do from day to day, in small amounts, or as revenge, which, by the way, is very ungodly so I shall try to refrain from it. I don't particularly mind if people have their moments of 'annoying-ness' once in a while but doing these things on a daily basis really makes me feel like strangling them.

Meh. I think today's post is a little strange, very not like me, but that's probably because I'm trying to squeeze out a post when I have nothing to write about.

So long.

-------------------------------

...when the sanguine smell foul

Friday 24 September 2010

Purple Porcupine Pickles Pepper

(I started typing this yesterday. Internet went down so I uploaded it today.)

I will start off my first post in about a gazillion years with about a gazillion (or a fraction of that) words about how completely narcissistic and impossibly materialistic American shows are in MTV. Seriously, what goes on in those producers' heads? Why on earth are they promoting this insidious over-reliance on all things tangible and the 'importance' of I, Me, Myself?

I caught the last few minutes of an episode of 'My Sweet Sixteen' or something along these lines just tonight when I went down for dinner. My sister was watching it, of course, since I would never, for the life of me (or so I think), willingly tune in to such a sickeningly sickening show. I'm not saying that all American girls act like this one I saw and that all American girls are materialistic and self-centred, but to show this kind of behaviour and deem in as 'COOL' and 'IN' is really over-doing it.

I'm not sure of the name of the person who was hosting the 'Sweet Sixteen' in the episode, but I do know that she is one of the first real life examples I've come across of the rather popular stereotype of 'blonds are bimbos and have none or one brain cell'. I don't really believe this so-called generalisation of the blond population because hair colour in no way decides how bimbotic a person will be, but by gum, this girl is challenging my very belief!

Her 'Sweet Sixteen' was a grand party in Las Vegas, complete with some gambling machines inside the hall area where her party is held. Before the birthday bash started she and her 'VIP's were already waiting for the guests in a back room which she will appear from later (escorted by a dude wearing nothing but black trousers and a bow tie, no shirt). I don't dislike her for wanting her birthday to be 'special' but what really got to me was the statement she made about her 'VIP's, the people who will be emerging with her from the back room later (like brides maids to a bride).

"They should be hono[u]red that they're here. It's a special privilege. They better not screw this up or else. I want my Sweet Sixteen to be perfect. It's all about me, I want all eyes on me." (Not accurate, of course, but just summarising the gist. No, I'm not twisting the meaning...)

I mean, what? Honoured to be at her birthday party? What kind of friend says this of her friends? Or does it mean that they aren't actually her friends? I don't really know the context of this situation but all I know is that people aren't dispensible like that. My goodness, if you want someone to honour you that badly, don't sound so high and mighty! Isn't it common sense that someone to be honoured should be someone who is respectable? As far as I know I'm not going to be respecting anyone like that soon.

For goodness sake, the world doesn't revolve around you! So what if it's your Sweet Sixteen? Congratulations, you're a second older than you were before, but so is everyone else! What I'm saying is, everyone is the same. There's no, "Oh, I'm more special than you since it's my birthday today." The world doesn't work like that! I couldn't be bothered who the heck you are or when your birthday is, and I'm pretty sure it wouldn't matter to the guests or the 'VIP's either.

I'm almost certain that what they'll remember from this party is:
1) Oh yeah, I had a great time.
2) This is the best Sweet Sixteen ever, but mine will be better.
3) Whose party was it again?
4) We really went crazy with the entertainment!
5) She's HOT, and so, so SEXY, but what's her name again?

And the list goes on and on. Point is, there is nothing more superficial than trying to please a crowd of people who likely don't know anything about at all other than your name and birthday, and are sucking up to you because you have great assets under your name and on your body.

I remember there was this once in the episode when the crowd was going wild over the (rather famous, I assume) band she invited to 'liven up' the party. Needless to say they livened the crowd up well. A little too well. She tried to call for the end of the little concert but the lead singer simply ignored her and said, "Your host thinks you guys should stop the party. But you know what I think? I think this party needs to rock on!" The crowd cheers, and the birthday girl stomps off mutter a string of censored curses.

You can see how much everybody cares for her here.

Earlier on her mother brought her to get a belly piercing, which she thought looked 'COOL' and commented on it, "Now I really feel sixteen!"

Yes, I can totally see how 'sixteen' you are just by looking at the belly piercing on your belly button. Oh wait, I can't even see it. *rolls eyes*

What does it mean to be 'sixteen' anyway? A large birthday bash? A sleek, beautiful Mercedes to drive around in and show off to your friends, having them clamour all over you and sucking up to you just so they can hitch a ride? A belly piercing? A sparkly, skimpy dress to prance around in and show off your wonderfully voluptuous figure? A boy in tight black trousers and a bow tie (no shirt, remember?) holding the hand which paid him to do so while walking toward a crowd of screaming teenagers who are either lusting after your flesh or the boy's well-toned abbs?

How about some maturity? How about some common sense? How about some LASTING friendships?

What's wrong with the pop culture these days? Can't they advertise the value of friendship instead of expensive celebrations and fragile relationships built on flimsy dollar bills and credit cards?

I can't help but compare what I'm seeing on the television with what I see around me daily. On the television I see raging hormones and glamarous expenditures, in Singapore I don't see any of this. Maybe being in a rather academically-focussed school has locked me out of some of the wilder sides of today's teenagers, but you don't see the local media adveritising that kind of selfish, money-minded and pleasure seeking lifestyle to our youngsters. The media, even with all its faults and opacity with issues like censorship, advocates lasting commitments and the value of emotional support and encouragement.

When I look at my sister in retrospect, I figure that hey, maybe she isn't so bad after all. Maybe, if I try, I can bring her back to the emotionally sensitive girl she was once before. Maybe, if I try hard enough, she will care less about the materialistic demands of her 'friends' and instead try to make real friends that don't need a S$30+ dress for her birthday present. Maybe, just maybe, if I try, I can make her see that she doesn't money so much after all.

I don't really know what is going to happen to the society if the media continues broadcasting these kinds of shows. I don't WANT to know what will happen. I hope that MTV will either stop airing these kinds of frivolous shows and start screening something of VALUE, or that Singapore will censor MTV's programs, like it does everything else.

I for one and glad for Singapore's strict censorship, because I cannot fathom what kind of future generation of leaders we will be nurturing if being a party heiress is something that is on their 'Top 10 Jobs I Desire' list. I simply cannot (and refuse to) imagine the future that lies ahead of Singapore should such wild behaviour be encouraged through the media.

I will not say I am a strong individual and am forever resistant to the increasing influential power of the media, so let me ask this favour of you. If you ever see me doing something as crazy as what MTV is promoting, let me know. Show me this blog post, and hope that I have enough sense left in me to figure out that what I'm doing is not what I want.

I want to live a fulfilling life knowing the value of friends, family, and the God up there who loved me enough to sacrifice his son for my redemption. I don't want a life of spirally disrepair knowing only of money and how to please myself.

I want to LIVE.

I don't want to blow up a picture of my pretty face and hang it in the entrance hall to welcome my guests and feel a burst of happiness when they say that the girl in the picture is sexy and beautiful. I don't want to show cleavage and smile like a thousand suns when someone tells me that they're jealous of me. That's not living. That's just plain degrading.

Of course, I neither have a pretty face nor some incredible cleavage, but I'm sure you get what I mean.

I want to LIVE.

And when I die, I want people to remember my NAME, not the party I hosted 50 years ago. I want them to remember that I'm the girl who lent them an eraser when they had none. I want them to remember me as the stranger that picked up a wallet and returned it when they dropped it. I want them to remember the sincere desire to help them, or just to let them know that I care, whoever they are.

I want to LIVE.

-----------------------------------------------

I also watched an episode of ‘Teens Cribs’ or something where this 13 year old American boy was showing the TV crew around his magnificent home. I cannot deny its magnificence, but I also cannot deny that I thought, 'If you have money to build a basketball court, a pool larger than my home, at least 5 bedrooms twice the size of mine, 2 gyms, a movie theatre, a bowling alley, a golf course, a sauna and so much more, buy a normal house, spend time with your family, and donate the unnecessary money away to charity!'

The parents were commenting on how they want their children to have the best facilities, so that when their friends come over they will always have something to do. I don't understand their way of thinking. I really don't.

Shouldn't they be encouraging friendship built on emotional bonds? What are they doing about those friendships built on material wealth that is being accumulated?

I don't enjoy the way the boy goes, "Now that I've showed you my awesome room and awesome gym I'm going to show you XXX because I think it will amaze you." "This is where we play table tennis. I always win of course." "Oh, we play tic-tac-toe here too. Of course, I'm the best."

WHAT?

Did I also mention that each of the 5 children have a ride each, either a scooter or a motorcycle, and the dad has 2 rides, a very large jeep-like thing that seats the entire family and a rather cool looking bike that is huge beyond what should be allowed of something that's called a 'bike'?

-----------------------------------------------

Today wasn’t spectacular, but it certainly started off rather interestingly. My father overslept today (didn’t hear the digital alarm clock go off) and since he was my alarm clock, I overslept too. I ended up waking at 06:15, a whole half hour later than when I usually do wake up. I missed the school bus, quite obviously.

Because of this my father decided that he would send me to school directly by the car, which I was elated to hear because I hardly ever take the car. In fact, I don’t take it unless it’s a weekend or a special day because I don’t need the car to get to and from school. Being very new to waking up at 06:15, I didn’t really know what to do. Well, yes, I knew I had to brush my teeth and tie my hair, but I was rather lost outside of that.

My father dropped my mother off at Toa Payoh MRT station before sending my sister to her school. To be honest, her school looked like it was located in the middle of nowhere. Traffic was almost non-existent, something very odd for a school with that kind of prestige (St. Nick’s). Perhaps we were early, because my dad was rushing to get me to school on time.

I arrived at school at around 07:05, 15 minutes later than I usually do. Morning assembly went on as usual, and classes bored me, same as ever. The first period was PE. We all went down to the field and those who weren’t helping Amanda take her PE assessment were made to run 2 rounds around the track.

ShuYing and I did run the first one until she got a stitch under the area where her heart is supposed to be, so we stopped running and walked for a while. Mr. Ho saw us walking and yelled at us to continue running. I was rather amused at how he didn’t bother checking the situation before demanding something from us. But we ran though, because Mr. Ho can be scary when he wants to be and we dare not take risks.

We completed the first round, and were completely horrified to find out that we were ‘ordered’, so to speak, to run twice. Being horrified and mortified by the prolonged running period did not stop us from running, though, because it was teacher’s orders, and we are good students after all.

However, due to the ‘chronic’ fatigue caused by the first round around the track, we walked half the entire stretch of the track before continuing to run, and ended up as the last to return back to the finishing point, wheezing and panting like we had ran a marathon. For a person as unfit as me, yes, I do believe this can be considered a kind of physically taxing race.

After some stretching led by Thao (it was her, right?) we proceeded to the car park area which doubled as a parade square to play some very ruthless Captain’s Ball. Well, not ‘we’, more like ‘they’. ShuYing and I stood off to a corner of the court where our Captain was and waited like soldiers on guard duty for a ball to come our way.

It’s rare for the ball to head our way, that’s for sure, because neither of us really have a history of being fantastic at sports, so people find it much harder to trust us than those physically active people like Annabel. I completely understand, and since I myself didn’t really want to get my hands all funny smelling and dirty by touching the ball, I was satisfied.

Then the moment when the ball flew our way came. I am inclined to believe that this ball was a stray ball, because I can’t think of any reason why anyone would pass the ball to this ‘hopeless at sports with zero motivation and spirit’ person, especially when it was so close to the goal.

Being the nice team mate I was I scored ‘beautifully’, and it was nice having people say, “Nice one” to me for a change, although it did feel a bit awkward and I turned away immediately after confirming we had scored successfully. It was nice knowing that for a few moments people relied and depended on me, but I shouldn’t get caught up in this feeling because people don’t naturally gravitate towards me. I have to do something to get people to do so, and I am not willing to try and take my place among the ‘athletic’ group of people. I was never really athletic in the first place, just a little more physically fit than others.

The ball came my way many times afterwards, and I believe I heard ‘Pass to (insert my name here)’ a couple of times. Wow, didn’t know my ‘trustworthiness’ at handling balls and scoring shot up by so much with just one goal. This kind of feels a little superficial, like what I was ranting about earlier, except this does not deal with material wealth but ability to score (which, by the way, is a completely useless ability unless I decide to delve into a sporting career, which I will not).

I missed a goal and the ball never came after that.

Huh, talk about fickle-minded.

The game ended with Celine being carried off quite literally by all fours because she injured herself trying to defend her side. I found out later that she was injured so badly she needed a wheelchair to move about. No bone was broken whatsoever but her ankle swelled up really badly so she couldn’t wear her shoes without further aggravating the injury (hence the wheelchair).

I was told to carry one of the chairs used to the PE room, which I had no idea where it was. As I was making my way there after some nice soul told me it was down the slope and far away (and apparently very smelly too, I reminded myself, since that’s where all the PE equipments came from and the equipments stink), Mr. Ho turned to ShuYing and I and accused us of not playing, to which I retorted with a, “I got touch the ball lor!” Well, excuse my horrible English. I’m usually like that unless writing or trying to speak in a formal setting (like the English orals which I didn’t do quite as well as I would have liked).

The chair didn’t stink as bad as the ball, so I was okay with carrying it. I just didn’t really like that I had to walk that far with this blue thing in my hands (and above my head, because I like carrying things that way). Thankfully I was told to leave the chair outside the PE room, which was a win-win situation for both me and the teacher. No smelly rooms, and someone brought the chair back.

Makes me wonder, why couldn’t the teacher bring it back himself?

Recess was next, and a horrible recess it was too since, among the rush in the morning due to the late awaking, I did not bring my usual triple-decker sandwich and had to purchase some really expensive buns and still not be full. I had a papaya later to try and fill my stomach. Didn’t work.

Chinese lesson was rather okay. I drew a bit, but nothing much, because we were going through a practice paper we did the earlier lesson and I needed to copy down the answers. I learnt quite a bit, although I’m not sure it will make much of a difference in my Chinese grades.

Assembly consisted of a talk by Mrs. Hoo which overshot the time limit and ended up eating into Social Studies. Mr. Lim came late anyway so I guess it didn’t change anything. I don’t remember much from the talk, all I did recall was ‘Not all that can be counted counts’. Heh, I thought it sounded cool, so maybe that was why I remembered it.

Social Studies went on as usual, with a bit of revision here and there and everywhere. The entire lesson was a revision one. I drew during this lesson, filling up the sheet of paper I drew on in Chinese class with the same character and his ‘foster’ daughter who is only three years younger than him.

Math lesson after that was quite a bore. I did get quite some things done, but not a lot. There was a bunch of new worksheets to be done that was given out today and which I dread doing (a lot). But I really do need to work on my radians and geometrical properties of a circle because I just stink at those topics, so the revision material was good, I guess.

I ate lunch with AY and a few of her friends which gathered around the table like salt crystals growing from a seed suspended in a solution of dissolved salt.

Math remedial was okay, but I was a little late since I couldn’t find the classroom. I finished worksheet 4 for geometrical properties of a circle and did some questions about angle properties. I like angle properties. I like angles. The sad thing is, I can’t memorise the names of the proofs.

The bus ride home was uneventful as usual. The walk home, however, is a different thing altogether. I quite enjoyed it, in fact.

It started raining while I was on the bus, so when I got off I whipped out my trusty umbrella, put it over my head and walked out of the bus stop and into the pouring torrent. At first I was bent on keeping my entire body dry, but I soon came to learn that it was a rather futile attempt since the winds were as unpredictable as my grades.

So I focussed on keeping my bag dry and calculator from fizzing out in a beautiful display of bright red sparks. The rain soaked my entire pinafore from the tip to the top. Even my glasses weren’t spared the splatter of tiny raindrops on them. MY GLASSES. They sit right at the top of my nose, not at my feet. If my glasses can get wet, anything can get wet. No, I’m not walking on my hands, if that’s what you’re wondering.

The rain was incredibly heavy, and the gushing waves that curled and hurled in the drains threatened to engulf it entirely. You could see the power and raw force spurring the rolling waves forward, sending them crashing into the stone sides of the drain and trying to break free. The sound was music to my ears, and the sight a feast for the eyes. I adore these things.

The cars that rolled by me splashed water all the way up to my waist. The water felt dirty, but I couldn’t really tell because the pinafore had already turned into a very dark shade of blue by then after soaking up so much rain water.

I was really tempted to throw my umbrella off my head and dance about in the rain since I love this kind of weather, but what held me back was the fact that I had important worksheets in my bag that cannot, ABSOLUTELY CANNOT, get wet. Oh, I would be doomed if I had to photocopy every single one of those…

It was also rather cold, and I got goose bumps and shivered like an intelligent chicken in a slaughter house. I still love the rain. Thank God that the heavy rain was on Friday, if not I wouldn’t know what shoe to wear tomorrow since it probably wouldn’t have dried yet.

Wednesday’s rain was moderately heavy, so my shoes got kind of wet. They weren’t dry by the next day but I still wore them anyway since they weren’t that wet. Thursday’s rain was fairly light in comparison. My shoes didn’t get as wet, so they had dried when this morning rolled by. Today’s rain was on a completely different level.

My shoes turned into sponge on overload mode and with every step I could feel water being squished out of the cloths of the shoe, and my feet could practically swim in them. It was an odd experience, but I have come by it before a few times.

Ah, monsoon periods are beautiful.

Now all I need is a pair of back-up shoes.

-----------------------------------------------

Oh, I don’t think I mentioned this yet.

I PASSED MY PIANO EXAM! So yeah, maybe it was only Grade 5, maybe it was a bare pass (and by bare I really mean it), but that is still a pass, and that still means that after my EYAs are over I can immediately unwrap that tablet waiting for me downstairs and use it right away! Isn’t that exciting! I can’t wait to try it out! How will my art change after that?

Heh, the fine string on which the tablet was hanging from has been cut! The tablet now sits a few laps away; all I need to do now is run to it. The race will end when EYAs end. I wish it was sooner.

Friday 30 July 2010

Throwing Light

(This post is around one and a half months late. I did write it earlier on the 30th but the internet got cut off so I kind of forgot about it...until now.)

*YELLS*

*SCREAMS*

*YELLS SOME MORE*

*SINGS GAILY*

*PRANCES ABOUT*

*YELLS AGAIN*

*SCREAMS*

.
.
.
.
.
.

*takes deep breath of air*

MY FATHER GOT ME A TABLET! OH! THIS IS WONDERFUL!

*sings and prances off*

-brief moment of absolute silence-

*comes back with silly deranged smile on face, but much saner than earlier*

It was actually rather anti-climatic, the way my mother told me, but whatever. I GOT A TABLET~!

...which I can technically only start using after I pass my piano exam. Oh horror.

Ah well, one more motivation to actually try an pass the exam. Oh, wait, it's actually the only reason I'm trying to pass the exam. I'm not exactly sure if you can count "I don't want to do another exam because my mother will make me retake it if I fail" as a reason...

Anyway, it was a rather unusual day today. The morning was rather cold, and so was the rest of the day because the rain just wouldn't stop. I know I love the rain and the cold weather it brings, but seriously, this is getting kind of extreme. On the really hot days I feel like melting, and on the colder days I just want to shrivel (yes, shrivel) up in my nice, thick comforter and snore the day away.

I am really sensitive to the cold, see. Well, I technically am just sensitive to temperature. Period. I can function within a very small range of temperature, anything other than that I tend to kind of go haywire, if you get what I mean, not that I'm functioning very well at my optimum anyway.

Because of the seriously freakish cold weather today, my jacket became my best friend of the day. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO WITHOUT THAT RELIABLE MAROON THING BY MY SIDE.

Yup.

So I went home, debating about seedlings and whether the term is of any use at all with ShuYing on the way home on bus 105. Needless to say, the conversation got cut short rather abruptly when ShuYing had to alight to transfer to the MRT. I spent the rest of the bus ride in relative silence, but there were these people sitting in the row behind me talking about...something.

I first gained an interest in the conversation when a male voice asked the person next to him, "So was RGS your first choice?" I was all...'WHAT IS AN RGS GIRL DOING WITH A MAN???'

Yeah, and then the conversation continued, and I found out the man had gone through NS, and I was rapidly going through possibilities of the relationship between the two. 1) Counsellor. 2) Boyfriend. 3) Stalker. 4) Friends who met on the bus. etc. etc.

Yup. In the end the conversation led to me figuring out that the man was a teacher at RGS and it kind of made me wonder, 'Is this some sort of forbidden teacher/student relationship?' Yes, I know I've been reading too much manga. So sue me.

I'm not really sure what their exact relationship was (so I settled for a normal teacher/student relationship who just so happened to be taking the same bus) and also kind of figured out that the student was giving directions to the teacher, because when she alighted (2 stops before mine) she told him that Lorong Chuan should be 1 or 2 stops away.

Before I alighted the teacher asked me if the stop I was alighting at was near Lorong Chuan (I was in the midst of getting off my seat, see, so he noticed), then I kind of froze for a moment and then spoke really awkwardly an affirmation. I hate talking to guys. D< I'm not sure what he was going to do at Lorong Chuan, though. All I know is that if I were the student he was conversing with earlier, I'd have decided to take the next bus instead after giving him directions...

So yeah. My tuition teacher arrived at around 15:30, and we had our tuition until 17:30. 2 hours long, and also quite boring, but we started talking about movies towards the end (the conversation began with me telling the teacher that was watched 'Ip Man' at school today) so yes, the tuition did end on a high note...well, kind of.

I made rice at about 18:38, and then continued using my computer. I bathed at around 21:05 because I was reading something online and didn't want to be cut off in the middle. It was rather weird though since neither my parents nor my siblings have returned home even though it's already so late. I entertained thoughts of them getting caught up in a road accident but brushed it aside quickly. I don’t want them to die so early…

I went down for dinner after my shower, during which my mother returned home and asked me why I hadn't eaten yet. Look who's talking (...yes, I do know she has work so she can't eat, shut it). I replied by saying I'd eat once I finish showering, and true to my word, I did eat after showering.

I went back up after dinner at about 21:45 and continued using the computer (you can see how much I LOVE my computer...). My father came back with my sister and brother during this time, and nothing much happened.

Then, at around 22:40, my mother suddenly raised her voice and said to me from the first floor (I was on the third) about how my father got a tablet or something. My first reaction was 'you're kidding, right?' because I'm pretty sure they said they wouldn't get me one until I had finished my piano exam.

My next reaction was 'OMG, if this is real, I really want to see it'. At that time I was still reading something online, but then all thoughts fled and all I could think of was 'if this isn't real, someone just wake me up from this beautiful dream, hopefully I'll really find a tablet when I wake up'. So I pranced all the way downstairs with anticipation (and bracing myself for disappointment, because I know my mother is capable of deception when she wants to…).

I saw my mother, who didn't look like she was joking at all and I asked her where the tablet was. She just pointed to the bunch of bags at the side and I rushed over to them. I spotted this big box inside one of the reusable bags and took it out, marvelling at the entire piece of equipment (okay, so maybe I wasn't admiring the equipment but what was supposed to be inside the box which was supposed to contain the equipment) and staring at it with wonderment and awe (see, Habit of Mind).

Everything felt so surreal, you know. Because I kind of resigned myself to begging for a tablet for Christmas and so totally didn't expect one to just appear right before me in the middle of the week out of freaking nowhere. I'm not sure why my father got the tablet today, or why he even got it in the first place, but for what it's worth, I'm entirely grateful, although the fact that the tablet came with really thick strings attached kind of scares me.

WHAT IF I FAIL MY PIANO EXAM? O.O

I believe I will kind of 'die' if I do. I mean, the tablet it just there. It's just THERE. I don't even have to source for it. My dad got it for me. For ME. Because I wanted it. This is so unbelievable. I would so totally be devastated if my piano results came back and told me I didn't pass. THE TABLET IS JUST RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME BUT I CAN'T TAKE IT AND USE IT.

Okay, yeah, I do know that I kind of decided that I wouldn't touch the tablet until all my exams (that means the EoYs too) are over because I'm pretty sure they'd be a great distraction to my studies. <--Look, I'm actually concerned about school for once...all hail me...

Yes, so even though I won't be touching the tablet until end of exams, I will still be disappointed if I fail my piano exam. That's because if I fail I'm gonna have to wait until I pass it, which would mean about at least another half a year of torturous piano lessons and going through another nerve-wrecking piano exam...

I DON'T WANT THAT.

If I had to do that, I'd rather wait till university (if I ever decide to pursue university education, that is) to get a tablet. I don't want to have a tablet dangle in front of me on a thin strand of thread but be unable to just grab it, only able to graze it. I don't want this kind of desire. It will probably drive me crazy.

And you know how much I love my sanity. (Oh, the irony...when was I ever sane?)

Monday 26 July 2010

Grey Sting of Metal

This is a this cat,
This is a is cat,
This is a how cat,
This is a to cat,
This is a keep cat,
This is a an cat,
This is a idiot cat,
This is a busy cat,
This is a for cat,
This is a 40 cat,
This is a seconds cat,
Now read every 4th word.

-------------------------------

Uh, yeah, I didn't mean to waste your time or anything, but I saw this and I just had to put it up somewhere. Just for the record, I am not an idiot, and I figured this out at 'This is a keep cat'. Yes, just so you know and don't use this against me. I found it hilarious, and I was completely GLAD that I figured it out before the last line...hopefully I'm not insulting anyone who couldn't figure it out, because I know just how easily I can unintentionally hurt someone with something I said in the passing.

-------------------------------

Yesterday I witnessed the glorious aftermath of a car accident. Of course, I wasn't involved in the crash at all, but it was the closest I've gotten to a real accident (other than the very, very soft bump against my familys car's back bumper). It made car accidents so much more real to me, since I've always thought they were something that happened, say, 20 miles from home.

One of the cars had its hood crushed beautifully. I don't think it'd work even after heavy servicing, but hey, with modern technology many things are possible. The other car, alas, was so much more unlucky. It was on its side with the back windshield smashed completely. I could see the underside of the car. The people whom I assumed were involved in the crash were circling the overturned car. I remember there was an old man (who looked quite spritely), a middle-aged man and a young boy. The old man was holding the boy, who didn't look traumatised at all, close.

I stared at the car until my father drove round a bend and behind a large expressway support pillar. I remember there was this policeman (quite young) with one leg propped up on the kerb standing over the shattered mess of glass. He looked kind of out of place.

-------------------------------

...oddly enough I saw Darren again yesterday at church, so that makes it before witnessing the accident. It was...odd. I was minding my own business in church during service when WHAM. The pastor said to a person sitting to the extreme right of the room, "Darren Lee, you're Darren Lee, right? Tell me, what do you do when you like a girl?"

I was all 'O.o'. 'ARE YOU FREAKING TELLING ME HE'S COMING TO SUNDAY SERVICE FOR GOOD???' *smacks face*

I really want to crawl into a corner, curl up and just emo for a few hours, but of course I didn't do that. I just felt like doing that for that one moment. I mean, I do forget things quite easily. I'm not quite sure why I wanted to emo. Maybe it's the prospect of facing some GUY I know? I fail at socialising. I fail at socialising with males more. I FAIL. *pulls long face*

-------------------------------

BREAKTHROUGH NEWS! URGENT NEWS! NEWS FLASH!:

Announcing that this dunce, this idiotic girl who cannot remember anything to save her life, has remembered when her Mathematics Unit Summary is due and has submitted it on time! This astounding piece of news is a phenomenon many scientists would never predict be possible, and even if it could be accomplished, would never be for it the possibility is so slim the prediction when it occurs exceeds her life expectancy. I repeat, THIS IDIOT HAS SUBMITTED HER UNIT SUMMARY ON TIME!

Whether or not she passes (with flying colours) is another thing altogether. It will be another miracle is she passes.

-------------------------------

I have recently gotten into Axis Powers Hetalia, a crack web manga which got published and turned into an anime. It was fantastic. I'm not really sure how to explain what it is, but the basic idea (and unique trait) is that it personifies each nation, so China is this 4000 year old immortal man who wears a red traditional garment and looks like a seme and an uke at the same time (when you view fan art, that is). America is this hamburger loving blond with glasses over his blue eyes and wears a bomber jacket. U.K. is a short blond with really, really thick eyebrows and is a complete tsundere. And there are many, many more countries. I think South Korea is just there for the lolz.

U.K. is my favourite character. I'm not really sure why, but maybe it's just because his really thick and fuzzy eyebrows make my own rather thick and fuzzy eyebrows feel not quite as thick and fuzzy as it really is. His tsundereness is just another plus point, as well as the fact that he can't cook. Oh, did I mention that he believes in fairies, unicorns and all sorts of magic? He can actually do magic, although...most of the time something goes wrong.

His relationship with Alfred (that is, America's human name) is really, really interesting. Arthur (U.K.'s human name) brought Alfred up, but Alfred ends up 'betraying' him to gain his independence, and in the process hurts Arthur terribly. Their relationship is much better now, although Arthur tends to show a lot of displeasure at whatever Alfred does, which I attribute to his tsundereness. Lol, you know you still love him, Arthur, don't deny it! I mean, how can anyone forget the affection they've nurtured towards someone whom they've brought up since young? Whatever kind of affection it is, that is.

Hetalia kind of makes History fun. For whoever who takes History, go read. It's interesting, you'll love it. Now everytime I see the words 'U.S.A.' or 'America', I keep thinking of Alfred, and it is kind of funny. Same goes for 'Italy' and 'Germany', and, of course, not to forget my favourite character, 'U.K.' or 'England' or 'Great Britain'. It makes life so much more fun, don't you agree? Now if only that could happen for elements...

YAY FOR IGGY!

...oh, Iggy is England's nickname. England in Japanese (as I assume from the subbed anime) is 'Igirisu', so the nickname 'Iggy' is derived from it. Really, England does have a lot of names, doesn't he. Let us count...

1) U.K.
2) United Kingdoms
3) The United Kingdoms of Great Britain and Northen Ireland (that technically counts as 2 countries...they've kind of merged or something)
4) England
5) Great Britain
6) Britain
7) Arthur Kirkland (England's human name in Hetalia as he requires an alias since he is human in physical form...)
8) Igirisu (England in Japanese, as I assume)
9) Iggy (England's nickname, derived from assumed Japanese name)
10) Igiko (England's fan name whenever he appears in his female form, which doesn't look like him at all due to the missing thick eye brows)

That makes 10...and I might still find more as I read more about it...

I am officially mad about Hetalia. And England. I like China too (Wang Yao). And Hong Kong. And America (Alfred F. Jones). And Austria (Roderich Edelstein). And Canada (Matthew Williams). Wait. I'm noticing a pattern. THEY'RE ALL MALE (even though I get super awkward around them, it apparently doesn't affect my manga preference...I draw a lot more guys than girls too...). Well, I don't really like Russia (Ivan Braginsky) though. I'm not sure why he's so popular...he's too weird. I mean, I know I like weird people but he...is weird in a way I don't like.

And I here end my rant on my life and Hetalia.

HETALIA!

(Yes, I know I lie, but doesn't everyone love liars? I think the world will be in much more pain if we don't lie diplomatically, or out of politeness.)

Monday 12 July 2010

TAG! You're 'It'.

MY TYPE OF (MANGA) GUY [or manga girl]

Which is to say, describes my preference for characters in mangas. No, seriously. I don't exactly go 'goo goo gaa gaa' about any character in particular, so these are just characteristics I'd like in the characters who do appear. Because if the characters are persistently annoying...I'll drop the manga and pick up another one.

AnYan tagged me on facebook, by the way, but I'm posting it here.

The 'quiz' (meme?) starts NOW.

Now, here's what you're supposed to do, and please do not spoil the fun. Copy and paste this into your notes, delete my answers, type in your answers and tag 20 of your friends here in facebook to answer this. Then see what happens.

if you're a guy - post this as my kind of girl..
if you're a girl - post it as my kind of guy..

1. Do you need him/her to be good looking?

Yes. As in, the manga kind of good looking. Any kind of good looking. If he looks too bad it turns me off as well. Mangas with horrible looking characters don't hold my attention for long because manga is all about the art, no?

If it's a girl, all the more. I get annoyed by girls much more easily than boys so, yeah.

2. Smart?

Yes. This is much preferred over brawns. Look, currently, even main characters of sports manga use their heads a lot.

Girls need to be smart. Or else they're going to appear really air-headed, and air-headed characters (especially females) can go drown in a pool of boiling acid.

3. Preferred age?

Late teens, I guess, although early 20s is fine too. They tend to be more interesting around this time of their lives. Too young = CHILDISH. Too old = TOO WISE (they don't make any mistakes, so it's not exactly very interesting).

4. Preferred height?

...165cm and taller. Short males are fine, as long as they fulfill most other criteria. I mean, it's not as if you can actually tell their relative heights to you in manga anyway...

Females have got to be 155cm and above if they're already in their teens. Short females are just crying out for me to disrespect them...

5. How about sense of humor?

Does not have to be present. It's perfectly alright for him to be unable to make jokes but as long as his attitude, reactions and behaviours are funny (whether he realises it or not) it will be

5. How about sense of humor?

Does not have to be present. It's perfectly alright for him to be unable to make jokes but as long as his attitude, reactions and behaviours are funny (whether he realises it or not) it will be satisfying.

I like female characters who are either sporty or serious, so go figure.

6. How about piercings?

Yes please! Only on the ears, though. Maybe exceptions in some places but definitely NOT on the tongue or any parts of the face. You can pierce as many holes as you want on his ears, so long as the lobe does not detach from the head. Of course, it depends entirely on his personality and status...

Females...I'd say it doesn't really matter. I mean, if I said yes, I'd be hating myself, which I don't exactly. Earrings for the more glamorous ones, sporty ones don't need to have them.

7. Accepts you for who you are?

Breaking the fourth wall much?

8. Pink hair?

...possibly. =) Wacky is good, too, although pink does fit Euphemia quite a lot even if she's not strange in that many ways.

9. Mushy or no?

Uh...maybe? Well it completely depends on their characters. I like the two extremes as well as the tsundere kind of characters. They're interesting to play around with.

(Tsundere: Used to describe a person who does not show his/her affection openly and expresses feelings like dislike instead, doesn’t want to show his/her soft side, wants to appear strong)

10. Thin or fat?

Thin. Not anorexic, of course, but Lelouch is acceptable because all the characters in Code Geass are stick thin anyway. I guess he is rather normal by Code Geass universe standards. Females have got to not have too much body fat.

11. Skin colour?

Exotic is good (dark skin + super pale hair!). Of course, pale is fine too. Yellowish Asian skin should be the best, though, since it is manga after all.

12. Long hair or short hair?

Both are fine. It really depends on the personality, type of hair, hair colour and such random stuff. I generally prefer male characters with hair that are long, though, but I tend to favour drawing males with semi-long hair. Females preferably should have long hair (lol, stereotype much?).

13. Plastic or metal?

It would help if I understand what this question was going on about...but metal, thank you. It's shinier.

14. Smells good?

OF COURSE. Unless he's a hobo or something. That's forgivable.

15. Smoker?

NO. But the act of sticking a twig between the index and middle finger and holding one end of the twig to his mouth does appeal quite a bit. Hands would be quite empty otherwise. If he was a real dude who stepped out of a manga or something, definite no. NO SMOKING OR YOU PAY THE FINE! Also, I am sensitive to air pollution, so yeah.

16. Drinker?

No thanks. Unless it's vital to the plot or something. Have you ever seen a 17 year old manga character downing beer like there's no tomorrow because his girlfriend broke up with him or he flunked a ridiculously hard Math test?

17. Girl/Boy-next-door type?

What? What does that mean?

18. Muscular?

Well-defined, please, but no overwhelming muscle definition. That'll be hideous. Gosh, imagine... I like male characters slightly on the thin side, as mentioned above. Or they can have no muscle definition at all. Females should NOT have too much muscle definition...definitely not.

19. Plays piano?

Yes. That'll be a nice bonus. He should have an appreciation for the arts. I like class (no, not class as in lessons, class as in elegance).

20. Plays bass and/or acoustic guitar?

Bass! I like the type of characters who are important but also rather background characters. Meaning that no one notices their importance, so when they die everyone's world crumbles apart and they finally realise their dependency on this character, but all is too late...MUAHAHAHAHA!

21. Plays violin?

Violins are nice additions to portraits. They look good. They sound good too, very soulful, so if the character is one who is more in touch with his/her spiritual self, I say go for it.

22. Sings very well?

YES. I also like characters who stand out. A lot. You know the way lead singers are always the ones being crushed on? Yes, same concept (minus the crush).

23. Vain?

Haha. Maybe. *laughs* I wouldn't mind if he/she has quality to back up their claims. I also like characters who have lots of self-confidence, though not so much that their heads could lift them into the air. This vain-ness, of course, should last only up till something serious occurs, then he/she should completely forget about it and focus on the task at hand. Show your serious side!

24. With glasses?

Ooh. Nice. Guys would be nice with them. Girl...not quite. I'm not exactly sure why glasses look good, but maybe they do cover up flaws in facial proportions after all...huh. I'm gonna draw much more glasses from now on, although my glasses suck.

25. With braces?

Are you asking if I mind them or if I like them? I think braces are quite nice. They make a character easier to remember and define them better. It makes the character unique, and they also have one more thing to complain about!

26. Shy type?

Oh, I like both extremes. The flamboyant and the shy, both appeal greatly as characters. They have their own quirks and personality definition that makes them SO fun to manipulate... *insert evil cackle*

27. Rebel or good boy/girl?

Both. Extreme again. Rebels are...cool. The nerds are...I dunno. But they are cool too in a much less outgoing sense. They're kinda docile, I guess, but there's nothing wrong. Oh! I get it, the nerds wear glasses more. So...I side with the nerds, maybe.

28. Active or passive?

Both, and neither. Don't make me decide! They're all great in their own way! The active make mangas much more dynamic and faster moving, the passive tend to focus on character development and the people in the middle are...a fine balance of both. I like action, psychological and school life manga just fine, thank you, provided the art proves to be satisfactory.

29. Tight or bomb?

Uh...both, again. Uptight people are fun. Their reactions are really great to make fun of. What's a bomb kind of person?

30. Singer or dancer?

Both? I think mangas about singers tend to revolve around spiritual aspects, like soul in the song and meaning of its words being conveyed through the tone of voice and everything. Dance is more of a physical thing, and the bodyline can be quite beautiful sometimes.

31. Stunner?

Yes, but hopefully not too much. It'll totally take the attention away from the plot (assuming the plot is good in the first place).

...or do you mean that gun in Star Trek where they use to momentarily render someone numb and immobile?

32. Hiphop?

Um, sure? This technically does fall under dance, right?

33. Earrings?

Oh, YES. Refer to whatever I said about piercings somewhere up, up above. I think earrings look great on certain kind of guys, and they're very nice things to add if you find your female character too plain or something.

34. Mr/Ms. count-my-ex-girlfriends-until-you-drop?

Uh...that would be an interesting character. Kind of like a gigolo or some play-boy, right? They'll be very fun and interesting to portray and/or read about. In a sense that they provide lots of comic relief, but on the other hand, there can also be a deeper, psychological meaning where they are not secure enough and yada yada, and the plot can thicken and so on. I like both.

35. Dimples?

Does that matter?

36. Bookworm?

Ooh, yes. Smart characters are good, remember? Of course, natural smarts is important as well, but we cannot deny the power of rummaging through thick volumes of Encyclopaedias and gaining fresh new insights to this rapidly changing world around us, no? Bookworms are good.

37. Mr/Ms. love letter?

Uh...if the love letter moves me, why not? I like manga that pull on my heartstrings. I seem to be reading a lot of these nowadays, and I'm loving it. I like that feeling of...oh, I don't know, of some sort of pang in your chest or something. It feels like I'm human, not that I don't know that I'm human, but well. Everyone likes some assurance.

38. Playful?

The kind that don't study for exams and still get good grades? Sure. The kind that likes to tie little ponytails out of some serious dude's nice blond hair? Go ahead. The kind that goes through girls like, I don't know, everyday? Well, I guess they're okay if they have some psychological trauma that's making them do that.

39. Flirt?

Uh, okay? I'm not particular about this or anything. You can be a gay for all I care, just don't rub your gayness off onto me. I'm Christian, 100% Christian. I do not want to be stained by yaoi or yuri. Oh, NO. *shudders*

40. Poem writer?

Ha, YES! Okay, I'm really into moving the heart and these kind of things recently. Everything about passive shows of affection to affection that is completely hidden (see Lelouch during the execution of the Zero Requiem, gosh, he's so...tsundere? Not really, but I just like the way he tries his best for those he loves). I like nice, enchanting, delicate (wow, so unlike me), meaningful, floaty kind of poetry. Flowery language, maybe? Of course, dark poems with a touch of class are great too.

41. Serious?

Oh, that, and those who completely lack serotonin

42. Campus crush?

Hey, who am I to dictate what goes on in their love lives? If it kinda gives them trauma or makes their personality interesting, way to go.

43. Painter?

Ooh! Nice! I'd like to learn from him, if I can, but seeing as the characters are in mangas...well, if they have deep meanings in their paintings, I say leave them be.

44. Religious?

That'll be nice, if the religion was Christianity.

45. Someone who likes to tease people?

Yes, yes, YES! Oh, those characters really are interesting!

46. Computer games geek? Or internet freak?

I don't really see the difference, but I suppose that would be cool. Think 'The World God Only Knows'. That guy is anti-social to the maximum because of gaming, but I think it's cool.

47. Speaks 20 languages?

Oh, great!

48. Loyal or faithful?

This is a prized characteristic. Characters who are unable to feel attached to something tend to be a little sad. Of course, I think that those kinds of characters have their own merits too, like being able to write sad poetry (oh, what's with me and poetry). Well, it would be nice to have a really faithful and loyal character though.

49. Good kisser?

That would matter how?

50. Loves children??

Haha, doesn't matter. Depends on if he's intending to have kids in the future, but preferably yes, I guess, although I won't hate him if he doesn't.



Erm...I tag...Kimberly (Art Club), Zann, and whoever else wants to do it. I mean...how many exactly can I tag?

Sunday 13 June 2010

Purple Dewdrops

...church was traumatising.

The service part was great and all, really, but after the service...

*goes into corner and summons dark clouds*

I ran into Darren. I thought the conversation would be the 'Hi', 'Bye' kind but it was WEIRD.

Darren goes to the same church as I do. Well, technically it should be that I go to the same church as he does, since he was there first. We bumped into each other once about...3 years ago? It was during the end of P6. Anyway, I've hardly seen him and I think he went to Saturday service when one service became two, so I haven't seen him, until a few weeks ago when I had the shock of my life and saw him right after Sunday service. It was like, WOAH, awkward. That was a genuine 'Hi', 'Bye' conversation, and then I didn't see him until today...SINCE WHEN DID HE START ATTENDING SUNDAY SERVICE??? Or is he attending Saturday service and coming to Sunday service on a whim (so much free time...)?

Being a person who is going to an all girls' school and who has limited interaction with males, I feel extremely awkward when forced to interact with one (which Darren is). I mean, yeah, my brother is male, my dad is male, some of my cousins are male, but really, I'm only comfortable around my brother and dad and I still feel awkward around my male cousins...so can you imagine this dude from Primary school suddenly striking up a conversation?

The conversation went a bit like such:

D: Hello.

R: *looks at Darren, turns away and continues walking* Hi. *notices how much taller he is than I am* You're damn tall.

D: *follows* Thanks. You're in RG right? How are the Rosyth people?

R: *continues walking without looking back* Okay lah. *walking becomes brisk walking*

D: Eh, why you dao me? You don't like me ar?

R: *still not looking back and walking speed increases* No. It's just...it's just...YOU'RE A GUY. *hurried rushes over to father who asks who Darren is*

END OF STORY.

(If you can't figure out who 'R' and 'D' are, you're seriously an idiot)

Seriously, I don't hate Darren or anything, but...he's a GUY. I mean, I could probably act semi-naturally around a guy who looks and acts like a girl but Darren is 100% a GUY. He's tall, for one. Well, not exactly tall for a guy but tall enough to dwarf me, which doesn't exactly require you to be very tall.

*shudders*

Crap. How am I going to adapt to JC life??? Ugh. I'm so going to DIE. Whenever I'm around another guy I'm all: Woah woah, it's a guy. TENSE. AWKWARD. Try to act cool (for what I know not). TENSE. Become insulting. DAO HIM. Be rude. IT'S A GUY. *alarm bells go off in head*

I, unlike most of my peers, am extra-sensitive to guys, so if I act extremely weird and tense, it's not my fault, okay? Most of my classmates probably meet up with their guy friends every now and then but I on the other hand prefer to stay at home and type on my computer, read manga, watch anime, draw, etc. You could actually say I'm a slight otaku for staying at home. Heck, I don't have any friends who are guys. I'm also not very close to the female friends I have now, so whatever. I'm kinda leading my life alone until Art Club time comes...

*wails* BUT IT'S ONLY ONCE A WEEK! *wails*

Okay, now to the boring part.

Title: ABOUT MY DAY
Date: 13 June 2010

Our church didn't have FUEL (that is, carecells) today so I only had to attend service which starts at about 10:00. As usual, my brother woke up late and we arrived at church at about 10:15, and by then service had already started. I found my carecell members, put my stuff on the chair next to them and started praising the Lord.

PRAISE BE TO GOD! I didn't have to sit alone today.

When I heard that Sister Kasie (pardon, I don't know how to spell her name) was going to preach today I was a bit disappointed. It wasn't that I disliked her or anything but well, I didn't really like the way she spoke. Did you know, today when she said 'witness' it sounded more like 'weakness' and she used the word in this sentence: You are God's witnesses.

Yup, you can imagine how weird it sounds, and to those who are not familiar with the verse that says: You will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, Judea and all of Samaria (or something like that, I can't remember names well), they will probably be all: Huh huh what?

But the story she shared with us about the sudden WHAM BAM of reality of how short life is really touched me, and I was tearing by the end. Goodness knows why. But I'm still not motivated to evangelise actively. I guess I'm just stubborn this way. Even though I do my TAWG (Time Alone With God) daily I still find it hard to actively preach the gospel and make 'disciples of all nations'.

After service I headed for the washroom and when I finished whatever business I had walked down the narrow corridor to find my parents. Along the narrow corridor was where the ultra strange incident with Darren occurred. I'm not repeating it. *shudder*

We went to this small Indian shop and had prata for lunch. I had my usual 2 egg pratas, which cost S$2.60 in total. Quite expensive, but whatever. Service was a bit slow and as we were waiting for our prata this strange Chinese woman kept yelling things like 'American Boy', 'Chinese Boy', 'American Girl', 'zhong1 guo2 zhu1' (Chinese Pig) etc. etc. to some person behind the counter. I never figured out what race and gender the person she was yelling to was.

It was extremely weird so I laughed and laughed and laughed. Discretely, of course...*sarcastic*

Then we had bubble tea, one cup of strawberry ice-blended with no pearls which my sister requested and one cup of honey dew ice-blended with pearls on my request. Of course, the honey dew tasted much better (to me), since it was much sweeter compared to the slightly sour strawberry taste. Ugh. Strawberries. How does anybody stand them?

The ice was really well crushed and it was so fine I felt like I was just drinking a really thick milk shake (the guy added some powdered milk thing to mine). Yum.

THE END OF MY DAY.

THANK YOU FOR READING.

HAVE A NICE DAY (or what is left of it).

I have to start on my Social Studies PT now...>_<...darn, I hate PTs.

Anyway, I think I forgot to add my name to my Individual Chemistry PT Report...I'm so gonna die...

T_T

Saturday 22 May 2010

Mud-Filled Heart

I won't be posting a profile about my characters this post. I promise I'll fill another post up with character profiles.


Psychological Test.

Write the first answer that came to your mind. Fill it out first before scrolling down!

1. In front of you, you see a number of insects. How many are there?
One, and it's freaking me out. It's a really large beetle staring back at me from the floor.

2. You were walking through the jungle when you saw something move past you. What (animal) is it?
Something really, really fast that's gonna eat me up if I so move a toe.

3. You're sitting on a chair about to cross your legs. Which side of your leg do you cross over? Left or Right?
Right, duh. Most people do.

4. You're on a safari jeep driving through the Safari ranch, and you see a lion feeding on the dead animal carcass. How do you feel?
Very grossed out and suddenly unbelievably afraid.

5. When you usually pour a drink, up to what percentage of the cup do you pour?
Nearly full. I like to take big gulps.

6. There are candles burning in front of you. How many candles are there?
Many large white ones, like in Professor Lupin's room in Hogwarts. All on the stands and lighted with a flick of my wrist. Ahh, fantasy. =)

7. A ship ready to take off by the harbour, makes a blasting horn sound. How long does it go on for
One very, very long one that tries to call out for attention.

8. You went into a room and it's all white, how do you feel?
Really freaked out, lost and afraid. It feels like I'm gonna be experimented on.

9. You're walking through a desert, how many pairs of shoes would you take with you?
I don't wear shoes. I don't walk through deserts. But if I must, I'd take one pair and ride a jeep.

10. You feel like drinking hot chocolate, and you open the cupboard. How many cups are there?
None. My cups are all on the counter.

11. A baby is crying, the doorbell's ringing and water is boiling on the stove. In what order would you resolve the situation?
The baby belongs to my neighbours. The doorbell will be answered by my mother. The water can boil until time ends, I don't really care.

12. You see an abandoned property (house). Is the door open or closed?
Closed. Very much closed. There are, of course, holes in the rickety wooden door but that's about it.

13. You get on a plane for the first time. How do you feel during takeoff?
Excited. Completely and absolutely excited.

14. You design your own house and draw a house plan. In the living room, is the ceiling considerably high or low?
Somewhere in the middle. Too high makes me feel lost, too low makes me claustrophobic.

15. You see an angel of death. He said that he'll give you a one day to do whatever you want before he takes you to the afterlife. How would you spend the one last day on earth?
With my family and neglecting homework. I mean, what's the point? I won't live to hand them up.

-----------------------------------------------------

1. The number of people that pisses you off right now.
One. Now who could it be?

2. How people see you.
Very, very fast. Yeah right (well, maybe for short-distance, but I FAIL at long-distance). But I do look like I'll eat them up, what with those angry-looking eyebrows I possess.

3. What you see in people : Right leg- personality Left leg- Appearance/looks
Personality. What a load of crap. Majority of people put their right legs over their left due to genetic dictation.

4. The feeling after watching porn for the first time.
Very grossed out and suddenly very afraid...as I should rightfully be since I'm not supposed to watch porn. I also won't be watching porn anytime soon (not that I'd do it at all).

5. The level of your self-esteem.
Woah. Almost full. Now this certainly is something that's ABSOLUTELY WRONG.

6. The number of people you can love at the same time.
Many. Well, it is true that I find people I know well quite...likeable, I guess. Most strangers are annoying.

7. Average time you spend kissing.
One very, very long one. O.o. WTH? What kiss?

8. Feeling right before your death.
Really freaked out, lost and afraid, like I'm gonna be experimented on. Ah, quite true, but there's always anticipation that I'll be meeting God soon. =)

9. The number of relationships you will have before marriage.
One. That's odd. I seem to have a few relationships going on right now. Like my sister-sister/brother relationship with my siblings and I have a number of friendships too...

10. The number of your TRUE friends
None. Darn. That sounds rather pathetic.

11. What you value the most in opposite sex: Baby- virtue, Doorbell- appearance, Water- wealth.
Lol. No baby, no doorbell, no water. Ah well, I guess there's nothing I look for (or perhaps I don't value the opposite gender at all?)

12. The door represents your heart. (i.e. determines how open your heart is)
Close (with leaks). That's...quite true, I guess.

13. Feeling after 'first kiss'.
Excited. Completely and absolutely excited. That makes me sound like a romantic...which I am NOT.

14. The level of your pride.
I'm not so proud, I guess. I always thought my pride was quite average.

15. What you want to do right now.
Spend time with my family (and neglect homework). Well, yeah, I do want to do that, but I keep thinking: 'I have time, it's okay to wait a few more days/months/years.' Of course, moral of the story always is 'There is no such thing as having time'.

Monday 17 May 2010

Boron Ashton, Bohrium Ashton

I will make up for the lack of a new character last post with the introduction of 2 characters!

BORON ASHTON

Boron Ashton, 19, fairly forgetful and careless inventor, doctor, marksman and swordsman who not only has good looks (read: slightly feminine appearance) but also brains and slight proficiency in art (as most inventors usually do). He has a younger brother, Bohrium, 10 (whom I will introduce later in the post) and is ambidextrous. He is Argon's official bodyguard and physician who performed his first operation at the age of 15 and is hailed as a medical prodigy. While being absent-minded and rather detached from reality usually, he is able to focus with unnerving concentration when the time calls for it.

He is the kind of person who is unable to come up with an idea if told to ponder and meditate on it for long periods of time. Often, he does much better when situations require spontaneous problem solving instead. Due to his marked unawareness he misplaces all of his blueprints, although none of the blueprints are actually of much use since they have all been planned and he only creates useful inventions with 'spur of the moment' kind of ideas. His blueprint of a 'gun' was 'stolen' by one of the nation's ally who adapted it to make it work, although Boron did have a completed specimen somewhere in his room (if only he could find it) which was made the moment the idea came to him so it never had a real blueprint.

At age 12 he came a proficient marksman and swordsman (his eyesight being sharper than the average person's) who designed his (and many others') weapons as well and hence proved to be a talented inventor too. He was the object of much jealousy and envy when he was assigned the position of official bodyguard of the king at the tender age of 12. At the age of 13 he attained his medical degree and 2 years after performed his first operation successfully though he had been spacing out during operations he had been made to watch from the sidelines to gain experience from. It is often rumoured that Boron bribed his way into his high standing but the gossipers never failed to be shut up should the rare opportunity for Boron to showcase his abilities arise. Even with all these achievements under his belt and feathers in his cap Boron never shows off, or perhaps he just couldn't be bothered to or was too lost in his own world to.

Boron is decended from a long line of aristocrats who have been stripped of their titles as Earls when a family head 3 generations before Boron refused to comply to the king's orders. It was during a time of war when enemies infiltrated the palace that the king pleaded with Earl Ashton (Sion Ashton) to kill him before the enemies could drug him and force him to disseminate high-security information about the country. Earl Ashton, being the king's closest friend, refused to do so and when the enemies retreated was removed from the title of 'Earl' by the king (who did so very regretfully). All subsequent generations have been close to the reigning kings but more times of trials and testings (all of which uncannily similar to that mentioned above) found the family degraded to the status of servants. Boron's family serves the royal family in the palace, and like all his ancestors, Boron has a close bond with the reigning king, Argon.

Argon first met him when they were five and Argon had fallen off his horse. While Argon's usual bodyguards are busy running around trying to find a nurse or maid to treat Argon's wound, Boron emerged from a nearby cluster of trees and bushes and edged toward Argon slowly. Upon reaching the young king Boron immediately began treatment of the wound using herbs and plants with healing properties. Being the child of a maid he has seen his mother use such medicinal herbs frequently and with the prompting of his brother approached Argon to treat his wound. Boron was, from henceforth, Argon's official physician (although he did go through intensive training in which he usually displayed knowledge superior to his teachers) and at the age of 12, Argon's official bodyguard when he attained sufficient prowess in shooting to defend the king.

Although he doesn't show it, Boron cares for his brother just about as much as his brother cares about him (which is quite a lot). It is due to his brother's inability to aim and desire to be like him that Boron took up swordfighting, something he was sure his brother would be able to do even without any coordination whatsoever, as it pleased him to know that his brother was glad to have something in common with him. The blade Boron made for his brother is single-edged as he feared that his brother's carelessness may land him in the hospital. Boron finds it difficult to express affection to others and hence has a very hard time convincing his brother that he does love him no matter how nonchalant he may seem toward his brother's affairs.

His hair is a glossy black, reaches to his calves and covers his left eye. It is neatly (and loosely) tied at his shoulder blades in a low tail with a small braid beside his right cheek. His eyes are black as well and tend to have a faraway and misty look most of the time. His attire is typically a long white cloak (more fantasy than laboratory, though) over a button-up tee and pair of loose black pants that reach his shoes. He is always standing by Argon's right (though quite unnoticeable as he hardly moves) with a set of hand-guns under his cloak and two sniper's rifles hung on his shoulders. He also has a sword on his hip but it is only used in the most dire of situations when the target does not stop advancing on the king even after firing many rounds.

Just an extra note, Boron is far-sighted and hence has some problems reading so he requires the aid of glasses whenever he does want to read (or aim at really near targets). His descended (Boriah Ashton) was the man who invented the machine that caused the Christmas Massacre when Boron was 5. The people from the future of another nation went back in time to conspire with the people of the past to kill off Argon and hence end the royal line as the king in the future proved too much of a threat to enemy nations. Somehow, the machine malfunctioned on the day of the massacre and all those sent back in time had their minds tampered with, causing personality changes, amnesia or even false memories. This made the future men lose their 'focus' and turn their weapons on innocents. At the same time, many people from both the past and future were transported to the other time unwillingly due to the malfunction.

BOHRIUM ASHTON

Bohrium Ashton, 10, brother of the highly respected Boron Ashton. He is, in all aspects save EQ and appearance (although in a different sense), much less capable than his brother whom everybody regards as a genius. He for one wants to be much like his brother but also wants his brother to smile, something that he is proud to say the he has succeeded once or twice. He is a typical happy go lucky kid whose main concern is his brother and animals, and while he is by law too young to work he sometimes helps his mother out in the kitchens and infirmary whenever the servants are shorthanded.

His 'information network' is very very large owing to his pleasant personality and face. The older maids just can't help but fawn over him and everything he wants to know about the palace he can get through them. Because his brother hardly ever tells him anything about his job (and is usually away from the servants' quarters and areas where servants work because he is a guard) Bohrium really tries to squeeze every single bit of information about his brother out of the maids as he has a 'brother-complex'.

The 'brother-complex' that Bohrium has is rather interesting. He not only loves his brother to the extent of being obsessed over his lifestyle but also has a certain desire to be just like his brother. He is by birth left-handed but has become almost as proficient with his right arm with just about any action due to constant training with his brother who is ambidextrous as his goal. However, Bohrium is not blessed with super intelligence or great eyesight like his brother is, and the greatest deterrence to become as good a marksman as his brother is the fact that he has absolutely no aim at all. While his mental endurance knows no bounds his physical body is fairly weak in terms of stamina and is hardly ideal for long battles, therefore he tends to try and master the skills his brother has that requires little physical activities.

He is not as forgetful or distant as his brother but he is very careless. While his brother's carelessness stems from his general lack of awareness of his surroundings Bohrium's is caused by his tad inability to coordinate his body well enough and walking can sometimes cause a bit of a problem to him as it is fairly easy for him to lose balance, slip and fall. That being said, Bohrium is aware that his brother only uses swords for his sake as he wanted to be as similar to his brother as humanly possible without undergoing a body change and really treasures his sword, a single-edged blade customised by Boron himself. Bohrium has, over the years, began to understand his brother better and can now tell the difference between when his brother is attempting to show concern and when his brother is just spacing out, something that no one else apart from Argon can say that they can do.

Bohrium is often much better company than Boron at social events as he is more open to strangers (not that his brother opens up to anybody) and is a much more interesting character to hold conversations with as his speech is animated and enthusiastic. He is also an avid animal lover and during his free time spends it in the forest calling various animals to him. He has mastered several animal languages (not much to learn, really, just basic calling noises) and made acquaintances with almost the entire population of animals within with palace grounds and most flying creatures in the entire country.

Bohrium's hair is a glossy black as well and cropped short at his shoulders. He has a perpetual twinkle in his black eyes and a broad smile on his lips always. Like his brother, a small bit of his hair is braided, but this time at the left of his face instead. His hair is also parted toward the left but unlike his brother has a fringe. He is usually seen in his brother's old clothes - a white cloak with black finishings over a button-up tee and a pair of long black pants. The sword customised for him by his brother hangs proudly on his right hip for easy reach.

Friday 14 May 2010

Midnight Serum

Yeah, whatever, the title's random again.

You'd be glad to know that I have once again updated this dead blog (oh, the sarcasm...).

Anyway.

I had my 2.4km run today, and I'm pretty satisfied with my results, to say the least.

Yes, I know what I got is a fail at male standards. I mean, why the hell are their standards for Standing Board Jump and 2.4km Run so damned high anyway? I really have to give it to the guys who actually survived their NAPFA tests...

2.4km Run
15:15 (mm:ss)
Female Standard (15): C [15:11-16:10]
Male Standard (15): FAIL. [<14:40]

Man. I can't believe it. 5 seconds less and I would have gotten a B...darn. That aside, I shall chronicle my time along the track while 'running' the 2.4km run (which was not much of a run at all) and maybe some Ihours beforeI (modulus this, which would mean I might talk about my entire day. =)).

It was a bright and sunny day and the birds were chirping happily. The blue ones were huge and round and had small yellow beaks which produced high pitch tweets while the red ones were nice and slim with long black hooked beaks and their voices were shrill. Their piercing eyes were the first thing I noticed when I woke up, and they were also the last thing I noticed before I fell into a swirling abyss of ooblack and lightblubs...

NOOOOOOOOO! NOT THAT ONE! DON'T LOOK! THAT'S MY ESSAY FROM TWENTY YEARS BACK!

Wait...was I even alive 20 years ago? *sigh* This talk is confusing me so I shall just tell that what you just saw was highly classified and should not be redistributed/released in any form. Thank you a whole bunch. Of course, I'm not even entertaining the idea that anyone would like to redistribute this piece of...crap.

So my day begins here.

I woke up in bed at 05:45 with a cramp in the muscle on my left leg opposite of the calf (forgive my apparently lack of knowledge of human anatomy) and thought that I was going to DIE and FAIL my 2.4, which I obviously didn't but when you wake up you tend to let your thoughts run wild, though I never made it a point to reign them all in in the afternoons or evenings anyway.

The cramp was still present when I boarded the school bus where I fell asleep for an hour hoping very badly that the cramp will disappear by the time the 1 hour bus ride to school (and on the way picking up other students) was over. Turns out it was gone when I got off the bus.

Praise the Lord!

Okay, back to the story. Since PE was first block I was horrified and terrified and scared stiff that I would be half awake during the 2.4, which, of course, is as unlikely as clouds would turn into cotton candy and lemon gumdrops would fall like the monsoon rain from the sudden green sky, but yes, being quite sleepy does this to you.

Oh, I do need to mention something. On the supposed day of the 2.4km run it rained halfway through the run (of the first half of the class, of which I am not part of since I'm register 30 so yippee for me) hence the run was cancelled and we were all told to go home. Needless to say we were very, very happy. Well, I was, anyway. I'm pretty sure that the people who had ran halfway were rather pissed.

The 2.4km run was therefore postponed. We got intelligence (yes, you didn't read wrongly, it's intelligence, not information, since RGSS is secretly a spy school and all students are required to put to use basic spy vocabulary) that our 2.4km run (which is supposed to test our ability to keep up with the strict regime of the spy course) will be conducted during the next PE lesson.

Of course, being the secret spy school of the century that only the most elite assassins and stealth personels may gain entrance to, PE is just a code for 'Physical Endurance' which all students of the school have to take part in so the trainers (in layman's terms, teachers, or as we amateur spies say, spartan instructors) can decide who to kick out of the school should there be another economic downturn and the need to retrench recruits arises.

That being said, the juniors (year 3s) and seniors (year 4s) are less likely to be forced to leave due to the fact that the school doesn't want us disseminating valuable intelligence that we've accumulated in our time in the school due to personal grudges and such.

I have decided that, for the better good of the world, I have to tell others about what we learn in school.

Mathematics is a cover up for lessons teaching us how to document classified information, write in code and organise files in a way that makes no sense to outsiders. This seems rather pointless until your home gets raided for being connected to the school.

Language classes include sign language and lip-reading and learning of foreign languages. Useful things to learn, especially when spying on trainers to find out more about their personal lives (in other words, stalking, or, more nicely stated, practicing our stealth)

Physics teaches us how to accurately shoot projectiles and how to use illusions to fool our enemies. The trainers are being unfair by not letting us test our our newfound knowledge on them. They always seem to fool us first.

Chemistry brings us closer to the mechanics of various bombs and also poisons such as Arsenic which we find very useful in eliminating adversaries (especially really annoying trainers).

Biology is spent memorising the human anatomy and which parts are more prone to damage and hurt more (useful tip for women: a man's downstairs tends to hurt really badly if you kick it)

History lessons are filled with the history of spy techniques and also where we indulge in rusted shurikens and darts. We like to try to kill the trainer when he/she says: All shurikens to me. The trainer, of course, never dies. The most severe case was comatose but he'll probably recover...

Geography gives us basic information of enemy grounds and also helps us train our perception and observational skills in planning escape routes. Rather boring class but comes in handy when emergency escape needs to be employed.

Literature isn't of much use but it does come in handy when trying to forge letters with a convincing tone of voice...

Area Studies is exactly what it implies, study of the area and places where we can exploit (like jungles can be used as natural cover).

Philosophy deals not so much with useless ponderings but more with psychology so we can predict our enemy's movements, launch counter attacks and become the next L (from Death Note). Trainers are all Lights which we must eliminate without haste.

Research Studies is just an excuse for the trainers to slack off a little and make us look up on the target (areas) ourselves. Certain students use this time to test their 'research results' on the trainers. Those who get caught tend to end up being sent into unknown territories to test the waters.

Aesthetics translates into designing our own clothes that best fit our body type and allow greater flexibility, learning to fake artworks, trying out various combinations to see what would produce deadly foods etc. Everybody loves this class because we like to put these deadly concoctions into our trainer's food.

Our principle was an ex-student of the school, likely threatened by the previous principle into taking up the job because nobody wanted to due to the inevitable death threats and attempts on their lives.






HOLD YOUR HORSES. Let me make something clear. RGSS is NOT a spy school and lessons are normal, if not on the slightly advanced side. I don't know what strange spirit took over me but I shall continue from where I left off...now come to think of it, where did I leave off?

Ah well. Let's just start anywhere.

So because the 2.4km run was postponed to the next PE lesson (which, by the way, stands for Physical Education, not Physical Endurance) and that 'next PE lesson' was the first block today, I was scared quite stiff, which really isn't all that stiff but compared to my usual blob-of-jelly posture I'd say yeah, I was very stiff.

Then came PE. We each got partners to watch our for. I 'choped' ShuYing and Rachel (Sim) got Jana. Both ShuYing and Jana ran first while Rachel and I sat one a small plot of the track that was...how would you say...tangent to the running area? Ah whatever. It was the little strip of straight track bits that extened from the straight part of the track and totally 'sidetracked' from the curving track. It was the one near the Squash courts (or haunted toilets, if you prefer).

So I got really pumped up watching the first group run, and was utterly in awe of Celeste who, even after running a few rounds (we were supposed to run 5 2/3 rounds since the track had a weird length...) still had more than enough energy to give us, the 'bystanders', a smile and a wave effortlessly. How the hell does she do that? She completed the race in 11+ minutes and just walked off the track like she had been doing stretches instead of running 2.4km...

Anyway, ShuYing was quite a good runner. She also got C. =) I couldn't see the fatigue in her though when she passed. I'm thinking she must have quite good endurance.

Then, when everybody from the first group had finished running, it was my (well, our) turn to run. I could feel my legs trembling beneath me...><

First Round: 01:30+
It was quite okay, I felt like I was sprinting more than jogging and I wasn't that much out of breath. I was supposed to be running (read pacing) with Rachel but I somehow just got ahead of her. If I should hazard a guess it would probably be somewhere near the downward slope, and at the downward slope I kind of let myself fall as always and that's usually where I'm faster than usual. I like that part. It always (well, usuallly) makes me feel like I'm flying whenever I 'fall' down the slope. Nice feeling when I don't have to really propel myself forward or anything. I was rather glad with my timing. It wasn't too bad, I guess, for someone with stamina like mine and who completely hates running long distance. I love 10x4 Shuttle Run, see. I get very nice timings for that, completely surpassing A by what, almost a second?

Second Round: 03:40+
Getting out of breath, even though I know I can make it to 7 minutes of jogging non-stop without dying. Since I was wearing the nice sports shoes I got end of last year and wore it now for the 2.4 (since my usual school shoe's sole is kinda flat now) I think I was quite a bit brisker than I would be if I was just running normally without the shoes with tapered toes. I just checked it out though, if we're running long distance the taper shouldn't be too much...ah well. Nevermind. 308 was at the basketball courts and my frieds from there cheered me on. =) They kinda kept talking about useless things like everyday stuff but even so it made my heart lighter to know that there is someone (or somemany) there by my side to cheer for me as I go through hard times (but they aren't, though).

Third Round: 05:50+ (I think)
Dying. Don't know why even though I've only ran for 5+ minutes. Anyway, this was when I started entertaining thoughts of walking or slowly down a whole lot until I'm almost walking. I didn't, in the end, because I was thinking: If I slow down now, I can't slow down later! And since I know I just have to slow down at the end since my stamina drains really quickly, I ran the whole round. =) I'm really glad that the 308 people (mainly AnYan, Moira, Melissa, ChunHui, and perhaps some others whom I cannot rememeber) at the basketball court cheered me on 'cuz I really needed it to keep going and not break down like an unoiled machinery a few hundred years old.

Fourth Round: 08:10+ (I think)
I walked about the first third of the round. I tired myself out by running instead of jogging, see. I am just silly that way, and also silly now for chronicling such insignificant details. I started walking right after I completed the round so I was in full view of my classmates who were trying to get me to run instead of walk. I remember I only wanted to walk for a little bit before I ran again but I somehow only re-ran once I've almost gotten to the sheltered 'bridge' between J block and H block (or something). I only noticed the blue markers on the ground and started running again. Oh yeah, when I started running again I couldn't feel my legs, until a few seconds later when the pain comes back again. I apparently strained myself too much.

Fifth Round: 11:...something
This time I walked almost half the round (re-ran where the track bends round the corner around J block and enters the basketball court area). What can I say? An exhausted person is a person who needs to rest unless he/she would rather crumple to the floor in a little lump of lipids, carbohydrates, proteins etcetera. I was rather tempted to continue walking for a little more but I guess my desire to get at least a C was quite strong afterall, even through I tried to convince myself the getting a Gold this year isn't important as long as I survive (and as you can see, I failed to convince myself). It was about this round and the previous one that Moira reminded me about mo4 xie3, and I think it was this round that she recited 'lao3 ren2 yao2 le yao2 tou2...'...

Sixth Round: 15:15 END
Walked for almost two thirds of the round. Too fatigued to do much but walk in what I felt was a rather brisk manner. When you're exhausted, any manner of movement feels like its too much for your strained body to handle...I walked even until the basketball court, where 308 resided (playing basketball?). ChunHui tried to get me to run but I kinda felt like falling over when she pushed me behind my back because my legs are almost too weak to support me. Then Moira approached me and urged me on to run, reminding me that my glasses were falling off my nose (an insignificant detail unless you consider my eyesight's badness) and AY was telling me that I've always wanted an A so I should push myself (even though I never wanted an A for 2.4 but for 1.6...). With all those people trying to get me to run, how could I not? So I sprinted. Really sprinted. I surpassed Evangeline (resident Netball player) and her partner and 'fell' down the slope, running like hell to the finishing point where I heard my timing and was filled with joy and gladness that I had gotten my Gold.

Praise be to God.

Ah. The joys of being Christian. Everything just seems to turn out right. I got a nice grade for Biology, 33/39 (I think) when only a few people got 30+. I also got a rather nice grade for Social Studies A.A. (yesterday) with 13.5/16, though where the hell that 0.5 came from I don't know. You know, I'm actually really really pleased with myself for the SS AA because I made the most significant contribution to the entire powerpoint! MUAHAHAHAHA! DROWN IN MY EGO! Okay, I must also acknowledge ShuYing who did just about as much as me. Phoebe didn't contribute at all and I think she was not included as part of the group...if only she had just sent something she could have gotten the grade! Why didn't she do anything????

I actually feel that God is being a little too nice to me. My deskmate studied very hard for all her exams but she didn't do as well as I did in some. I didn't study much for my exams at all, so I'm really quite baffled as to why I got better grades. I mean, God isn't supposed to be biased like this, right? Well, that's the perks of being Christian for you. Though maybe, I'm just a natural genius! *literally sees readers going: 'Yeah, right' sarcastically*

Anyway, after PE was recess, in which I sweated all throughout and I imagine I have a very nice shiny sheen on my skin all over my body as I fell gratefully onto the canteen seat, trying to gulp as much water as possible in one go. After a very long (15min) rest on the seat I finally decided to get something to eat. Since I didn't have money with me I asked Jana for some to buy a banana. I've heard it replenishes energy quickly.

On the way to the store to buy the banana I felt dizzy and uncomfortable, like there was something wrong with my stomach. While standing in line to buy the banana there were many times I felt like keeling over and puking. What was worse was that the people in front of me took a very long time to purchase their food and get their change so by the time I got to the counter I probably looked like death reincarnate. I picked up a banana (tried to get the biggest one that didn't seem too rotten) and paid the nice lady, who returned me 10 cents so now I know that a banana costs 30 cents. Hm, I thought it cost 40 cents...

Anyway, on wobbly feet and hunched back, I made my way very tediously back to my seat and collapsed onto it, returning Jana the 10 cents, peeling open my banana and eyeing it like a stalker would its victim. I finished the banana in a few seconds and was still covered in a nice sheen of shiny sweat. After sitting and moping around for another few more minutes I went back up to class, where I fell onto my seat and sat like a statue, talking being the only exercise done.

I conversed a little with Rachel, who told me that after I left her in my 'dust' she followed what I did, so she stopped when I stopped and she ran when I ran. In the end she got a C too. She was always a certain distance away from me, not much more nor much less. I guess in a way I did help her pace...O.o

Before recess ended I changed into my blouse in the toilet and then sat in my seat again to try to dry off my sweat. Only when recess neared its end did I pull my pinafore (very painstakingly since my arms were sore as well) over my head, gathered my Chinese stuff and left the class for Express Chinese, walking very unsteadily and with a very light head.

I recovered most of my strength in Chinese class (oddly enough...) and I had great fun talking to AY and Moira during Chinese...even though I'm pretty sure we're not supposed to do that. Ah wall, rules are made to be broken...so says the person who follows school rules (other than hair) like I would a manga I love a lot, which is to say, quite closely.

Following Chinese was assembly, where there was a fairly interesting 'skit' by the Science RA students (year 4) which incorporated a few Sciences and concepts. Quite intersting, really, if only they didn't make King Argon look so ugly. King Argon was mine first before it was theirs! Argon should only wear simple cloaks and not ones with golden edges and looking like they were made of spun white gold! King Argon has red hair, not black! King Argon is cool, not lame!

They really ruined Argon this time...

After assembly was Social Studies where the rest of the groups who haven't presented their AAs presented their AAs. The AA has a time limit of 5 minutes, even though Mr. Lim (that is, my SS teacher) doesn't really know why since the groups will be graded on content not presentation and even if the group exceeded the time he would take a look at the slides which have yet to be shown and then grade accordingly.

Math was rather okay, but I felt that Ms. Tan was too fast. I could barely catch up, not that I could usually catch up anyway.

Then ShuYing and I had lunch. Well, ShuYing had a packet of Iced Lemon Tea while I ate the sandwhiches I was supposed to have eaten for recess but was too tired to go up, get them and come back down again to consume them as eating them in class would be 'illegal', so to speak.

We then boarded 105 and went home. ShuYing got off at Toa Payoh Station while I remained on the bus, doing my Math homework...

Lots of PTs this time and quite a bit of homework too. Cross your fingers and hope I don't stress myself out, unless you want me dead.

This has got to be the longest post in a really long time, but I hope it doesn't put you off. *"sweet" smile*

And so into the dark abyss he fell, losing all sense of direction and feeling a disturbing drowsiness overtake his consciousness. There was nothing to grab on to for comfort, just an unending darkness swirling, swirling.